| Name | Gill |
|---|---|
| Rank | Warrant officer |
| Feature | Very cool tattoo |
| Anecdote | Good football game |
Generate soldiers
| Name | Suzuki |
|---|---|
| Rank | Private |
| Feature | Fingerless gloves |
| Anecdote | Alien abductee |
| Name | Ramirez |
|---|---|
| Rank | Corporal |
| Feature | Duplicitous coward |
| Anecdote | Faked moon landing theory |
| Name | Stone |
|---|---|
| Rank | Sergeant |
| Feature | Fishing line stitches |
| Anecdote | Broke out of a Soviet gulag |
| Name | Abrams |
|---|---|
| Rank | Major |
| Feature | Duplicitous coward |
| Anecdote | Quaalude experiences |
| Name | Kowalski |
|---|---|
| Rank | Captain |
| Feature | Argumentative |
| Anecdote | Harassed by men in black |
| Name | Hasan |
|---|---|
| Rank | Colonel |
| Feature | Knuckle tattoos |
| Anecdote | Sworn to secrecy about a coverup |
| Name | Hale |
|---|---|
| Rank | Captain |
| Feature | Very cool tattoo |
| Anecdote | Harassed by men in black |
| Name | Mohammed |
|---|---|
| Rank | Sergeant |
| Feature | Lover and a fighter |
| Anecdote | Current fad is a CIA psyop |
| Name | Woo |
|---|---|
| Rank | Captain |
| Feature | Shaved head |
| Anecdote | Incomprehensible saga about daily errands |