| Name | Hawk |
|---|---|
| Rank | Sergeant |
| Feature | Extremely organized |
| Anecdote | Fired cop |
Generate soldiers
| Name | Kowalski |
|---|---|
| Rank | Corporal |
| Feature | Strict vegan |
| Anecdote | Nearly murdered for hustling |
| Name | Blazkowicz |
|---|---|
| Rank | Major |
| Feature | Main character |
| Anecdote | Favorite athlete's greatest achievement |
| Name | Suzuki |
|---|---|
| Rank | Private |
| Feature | Chain-smoker |
| Anecdote | Nearly murdered for hustling |
| Name | Hale |
|---|---|
| Rank | Private |
| Feature | Incredibly confusing |
| Anecdote | Faked moon landing theory |
| Name | Abrams |
|---|---|
| Rank | Private |
| Feature | Bulky glasses |
| Anecdote | Shaggy dog joke |
| Name | Takahashi |
|---|---|
| Rank | Private |
| Feature | Fingerless gloves |
| Anecdote | Failed celebrity |
| Name | Abrams |
|---|---|
| Rank | Sergeant |
| Feature | Incredibly confusing |
| Anecdote | Fired cop |
| Name | Kilgore |
|---|---|
| Rank | Private |
| Feature | Very cool tattoo |
| Anecdote | Robbed a gas station |
| Name | Callahan |
|---|---|
| Rank | Captain |
| Feature | Duplicitous coward |
| Anecdote | Cryptid encounter |