| Name | Johnson |
|---|---|
| Rank | Major |
| Feature | Incredibly confusing |
| Anecdote | Niche hobby hard sell |
Generate soldiers
| Name | Takahashi |
|---|---|
| Rank | Corporal |
| Feature | Takes joy in killing |
| Anecdote | Woodstock attendee |
| Name | Suzuki |
|---|---|
| Rank | Sergeant |
| Feature | Hotheaded |
| Anecdote | Acid trip revelation |
| Name | Stone |
|---|---|
| Rank | Corporal |
| Feature | Strict vegan |
| Anecdote | Captured by pirates |
| Name | Takahashi |
|---|---|
| Rank | Sergeant |
| Feature | Dissociating |
| Anecdote | Cryptid encounter |
| Name | Antonov |
|---|---|
| Rank | Private |
| Feature | Fishing line stitches |
| Anecdote | Bad comedy routine |
| Name | Nguyen |
|---|---|
| Rank | Corporal |
| Feature | Misanthropic nihilist |
| Anecdote | Woodstock attendee |
| Name | Abrams |
|---|---|
| Rank | Captain |
| Feature | Overthinker |
| Anecdote | Good football game |
| Name | Kramer |
|---|---|
| Rank | Private |
| Feature | Movie star face |
| Anecdote | Quaalude experiences |
| Name | Okoye |
|---|---|
| Rank | Lieutenant |
| Feature | Failed hanging scar |
| Anecdote | Sworn to secrecy about a coverup |